I've been running in circles for the greater half of 2009 and this far on it has only recently come to my attention that all my efforts to find serenity have only led me astray. This isn't to say that I regret what I had been through or rather put myself through over the span of the past few months. Nothing could be further from the truth. All I'm saying here is that although I've covered some ground in my effort to identify and act upon whatever it is I feel I need to live happily, it really hasn't gotten me that far from where I was last year. I'm still stuck somehow.
I was getting there, at least what Pie told me about last June. Looking back, I could see how far back I slipped and how close I was to that goal; that sense of serenity. Following what may very well be a concrete sense of epiphanies on account of what I find to be less than favorable experiences with friends, near-romantic engagements and a fair amount of self discovery; it all went back to how well I got along with myself and how I chose to associate with others in reference to that.
There was a time where I was happy this year, alone but not lonely and ready to take on a whole new world of opportunities.I let old habits get the best of me and now I'm paying the price. Sir Batican, Ma'am Orange, Ma'am Jeng and everyone I've worked with and worked under this semester, I'm sorry for not doing my best and letting myself slip. I owe a lot to you people and this is NOT how I'd want to repay you. To my family, I still don't know what it's like being a son but I'll try my best to at least make you happy. All I really want for myself is to be someone you'd all be proud of. To my friends, I'm sorry for taking all of you for granted and for pushing you away when all you ever meant was for the best. I keep on saying this time and again, sadly because I let myself slip just as often. Of everyone I need to make amends with, you're the ones I have to make up to the most.
It's the end of another semester and I'm tired.
I was getting there, at least what Pie told me about last June. Looking back, I could see how far back I slipped and how close I was to that goal; that sense of serenity. Following what may very well be a concrete sense of epiphanies on account of what I find to be less than favorable experiences with friends, near-romantic engagements and a fair amount of self discovery; it all went back to how well I got along with myself and how I chose to associate with others in reference to that.
There was a time where I was happy this year, alone but not lonely and ready to take on a whole new world of opportunities.I let old habits get the best of me and now I'm paying the price. Sir Batican, Ma'am Orange, Ma'am Jeng and everyone I've worked with and worked under this semester, I'm sorry for not doing my best and letting myself slip. I owe a lot to you people and this is NOT how I'd want to repay you. To my family, I still don't know what it's like being a son but I'll try my best to at least make you happy. All I really want for myself is to be someone you'd all be proud of. To my friends, I'm sorry for taking all of you for granted and for pushing you away when all you ever meant was for the best. I keep on saying this time and again, sadly because I let myself slip just as often. Of everyone I need to make amends with, you're the ones I have to make up to the most.
It's the end of another semester and I'm tired.
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